Message from Valerie in Addictions Forum

This is my second time visiting this site. The first time I kept saying to myself that I obviously don't have a problem since most of these people take way more prescription drugs a day then I do. However, late yesterday I ran out of my medication and realized I may have a serious problem. I actually went to my doctor after my first visit to this site and told him I wanted to stop taking Vicoden for pain (I still had some left) because I didn't want to become addicted and now I could kick myself for that! I honestly thought it would be no big deal to stop taking them since I only took 4-6 a day and even my doctor said that was not that much, but what a fool I was!!! I can't believe I've lived in this dream world this long!!! Now I'm miserable (tired, shaking, sick to my stomach, etc) and am sitting here trying to act like nothing is wrong and seriously considering calling my doctor and BEGGING him to fill my prescription. I know I shouldn't, that I should be strong, but no one knows that I was even taking the pills and I really feel like I have no one to go to. I have a husband and 2 small boys who have no idea because I was really functioning normal (taking care of my family and holding down a very good job) and I never realized I could have a problem. I think what is scaring me most is this need I have inside to figure out a way to get some. I've even considered the Internet, but I'm afraid of getting caught. Anyway, thanks for listening and ANY advice would be so appreciated---you have no idea. I can only hope to get through this without calling my doctor or seeing another one to get more.

Thanks for your support.

Dear Valerie-

The truth is that no one ever thinks that they have a problem until they try to stop. Overcoming addictions is tough but it can be made easier if you have someone that can offer support. My husband and family supported me so much through this journey and continue to do so. The thought of my babies and husband really made me focus on my recovery. Please think of your family and consider confiding in your husband or a family member or even a close friend. I send you many blessings on your road to recovery. Please let us know how you are doing.

With love & respect,
Melanie
xoxox